We here at Beer Cruise are dedicated to bringing you, the viewer, only the highest quality of content. That is why we chose to, on occasion, simply and quite inexplicably fall of the map without reason or warning, in order to avoid the creation of rushed, sub-par content developed as a product of the over-tiredness, over-eating, and over-drinking brought on by the holidays. This writer does not want to claim that he is noble for these actions...but damned if he can think of a word more suiting.
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| Bravo...bravo you brave, selfless bastard you. |
Ah but you have come for the discussion on beer. While it is certainly an easy task to segue from the topic of nobility onto that most valiant of beverage, this particular article will not be the usual fare. No, this week, no one beer will be reviewed; instead, we will review the Year...of Beer.
And what a year 2011 was for me on the beer front. Some new brews, some malts from the aging vaults, and quite frankly some fail ales as well. I discovered a lot about myself and what I like in a beer as well. I've enjoyed beer quite a lot for a number of years now, but in the time since beginning this blog, I have grown from a simple admirer into an unapologetic elitist hipster of the beer world...and I would trade it for nothing. Well, perhaps for some sort of triple chocolate mocha imperial stout. Luckily for you lot, no such beverage exists to my knowledge (if you know of a such a beer, please write to me at Ihaveachievednirvana@butyouhaventsucker.com).
Thus I shall present my categories for judgment for 2011. They are as follows:
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| So exciting! |
Best Spring/Summer Seasonal
I've lumped Spring and Summer together because they are effectively the same season with slightly different temperatures. If you're a bit of a social dork, and are offended by this statement, kindly leave a comment below, which will be promptly ignored/mocked/modified to make you look even dumber. The nominations are:
- Longwood, Framboise
- Mill Street, Lemon Tea Beer
- Howe Sound, King Heffy Imperial Hefeweizen
Best Fall/Winter Seasonal
Fall and Winter, while not as shamelessly similar as Spring and Summer, get paired together because many of their individual seasonals work well in the other. Pumpkin pie is no less delicious at the end of December than it is in October now is it? The nominations are:
- Howe Sound, Pumpkineater Imperial Pumpkin Ale
- Tree Brewing, Jumpin Jack Pumpkin Ale
- Lost Coast, Winterbraun Winter Ale
- Dead Frog, Christmas Beeracle
Best Taste
This particular category takes into account only taste; aroma and longevitiy are not considered. This is for the beer that punches you in the face the hardest. The nominations are:
- Lighthouse, Navigator Dopplebock
- Tree Brewing, Spiced Reserve Ale
- Brooklyn Brewing, Black Chocolate Stout
- Crannog, Back Hand of God Stout
- Yukon Brewing, Midnight Sun Espresso Stout
Best Aroma
Smell...perhaps the most underrated of senses. Quite possibly because of the existence of the fart. Yes...yes that was a fart joke...right here on Beer Cruise. Stay tuned folks; it can only heat up from here. The nominations are:
- Howe Sound, Pumpkineater Imperial Pumpkin Ale
- Unibroue, Trois Pistole
- Dead Frog, Mint Chocolate Brown Ale
- Yukon Brewing, Midnight Sun Espresso Stout
Best Value
This is a category I debated having, and ultimately went along with. It's for the beer that provides the best bang for your buck, taking into account price, quantity, quality and alcoholic content. The nominations are:
- Red Racer, Pumpkin Ale
- Mill Street, Coffee Porter
- Rogue, Mocha Porter
- Vancouver Island Brewing, Hermannator
- Yukon Brewing, Midnight Sun Espresso Stout
Biggest Surprise
Sometimes you let your guard down. Sometimes you're expecting something tame or average, and then WHAM! It breaks your goddamn teeth with its savagery. These beers are excellent examples of such. The nominations are:
- Lighthouse, Cream Ale
- Lighthouse, Uncharted Belgian IPA
- Unibroue, Trois Pistole
- Tree Brewing, Jumpin Jack Pumpkin Ale
- Crannog, Back Hand of God Stout
Biggest Disappointment
Unfortunately, 2011 was not all sunshine and bunny rabbits. There were some downsides to it as well. Perhaps some of these mediocre beers that I expected more of should have been made into a review on Beer Cruise, but quite frankly it's difficult to write passionately about something that wasn't bad enough to be offensive, but was also a major let down. The nominations are:
- Philips Brewing, Blueberry Pail Ale
- Howe Sound, Father John's Winter Ale
- Wolf Brewing, Woodcutter Dark Lager
- Rogue, Chipotle Ale
- Lighthouse, Winter Ale (not the beer, the fact it was only available in the damned variety pack!)
Best Art
You might not think bottle/can art matters when it comes to the finer points of beer tasting. You also might think it's a good idea to lick windows while wearing a purple butterfly costume; I really have no idea what crazy people might think. Regardless, it's here, so you'd best deal with it. The nominations are:
- Lighthouse, Uncharted Belgian IPA
- Russel Brewing, Black Death Porter
- Red Racer, absolutely everything they make
Best Cruising Beer
Ah, perhaps the most important category of all! Or was that most irreverent? I suppose we'll never know. At any rate.... The nominations are:
- Vancouver Island Brewing, Hermannator
- Russel Brewing, Black Death Porter
- Lighthouse, Navigator Dopplebock
Best Cruiser
Is this relevant to a beer blog? Do I care? The nominations are:
- Electra Cruiser
- Electra Straight-8
- Nirve Chopper
Best Brewery
And now we get to some pretty majorly seriousface awards here. The best brewery of 2011. For the purposes of this being a brand new blog for 2011, this, as with all other categories, takes into account both new beer and those that have been around for years. The best brewery cannot merely produce one great beer and call it a day; they have to prove their worth multiple times to me. Yes me, this is my blog, get over it. This is a big one folks. The nominations are:
- Howe Sound Brewing. The 1 litre bottles, the (often) high alcohol content, the massive variety of beer, the absolute professionalism of the majority of said beers and fantastic new, creative additions make Howe Sound one of the best breweries of 2011.
- Unibroue Cambly Quebec. While I boarded the Unibroue express a bit late, I've very quickly come to appreciate what Quebec is capable of when it stops trying to form its own magical country-within-a-country for 5 minutes to make some extremely wonderful beer.
- Tree Brewing Co. While Tree has not garnered the amount of attention from me that it rightly deserves, it has recently made its way onto my radar with some genuinely amazing beers, like their Jumpin Jack and Spiced Reserve Ale.
- Lighthouse Brewing. I must admit, I'm not the biggest fan of their 'mainstream' line, but Lighthouse sure as hell knows how to make a premium craft beer. I also love their bottle art, and they gain bonus points for using local artists for such.
- Dead Frog. The little brewery that attracted the ire of mighty Sleeman's makes my list because they provide great 'regular' beer (355 ml bottles) for each season, as well as a surprisingly large line of very, very creative premium beer that you just do not see from other breweries.
Best Beer
This is the big one. THE beer of 2011. What will it be? Will it be dark? Will it be light (lol)? Will it be from this province? This country? Observe below. The nominations are:
- Howe Sound, King Heffy Imperial Hefeweizen. An absolute monster in a sea of good-yet-limp-wristed hefeweizens, this Imperial take by Howe Sound shatters your illusions of what's possible with a refreshing summer beer. Can the King be dethroned?
- Yukon Brewing, Midnight Sun Espresso Stout. What a shock this beer was. Who expects to find this level of quality in a 355 ml bottle? This stout is above and beyond what most stouts twice its price can achieve. Coffee and beer lovers...rejoice and join hands.
- Brooklyn Brewery, Black Chocolate Stout. Who knew that New York was good for more than just making pizza and providing a nice backdrop for Spiderman to catch bad guys in? This is one hell of a stout, absolutely savage and unforgettable.
- Unibroue, Trois Pistoles. Even more surprising than Brooklyn's contribution, it appears Quebec is capable of producing something other than a treasonous separatist party. Trois Pistoles is a remarkable and unique beer that's both dark and strangely refreshing and crisp at once.
- Crannog, Back Hand of God Stout. The name. Oh, that name. And rightly earned, because while my experience with this beer was sadly extremely limited, it was a memorable one at that, and indeed felt like the Almighty struck me harshly for taking his name in vain so very many times. Goddammit.
- Tree Brewing, Jumpin Jack Pumpkin Ale. Just when I thought Howe Sound's Pumpkineater was the absolute cutting edge of autumn brewing technology, Tree comes along to challenge that thought. While I can't say Jumpin Jack absolutely trumps it, it at the very least matches it without breaking a sweat...and what a feat indeed.
Annnnnnnnnd you'll have to wait for the results while I mull over my decision making process.
Thus we are brought to the beer of discussion for the week: it's Dark Force, by, uh...by...Haan-...HaandBryg-...a Norwegian microbrewery. So what is this beer, pray tell? It's (you'd best brace yourself for the impending onslaught of awesome) a 'double extreme imperial wheat stout'. How many other things in history have you ever wanted to try as much as that? On sheer naming prowess alone, this beer stands so far above all others that one could only conclude it has reached the halls of Valhalla. 
